


valentine under the sunshine

by MyNightmareIsMyMirror



Series: My hot neighbors won't leave me alone [1]
Category: Dream Daddy: A Dad Dating Simulator
Genre: M/M, Multi, Valentine's Day, my dadsona is a grumpy detective with a five o'clock shadow
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-08-08
Updated: 2019-08-08
Packaged: 2020-08-11 19:24:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,154
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20158822
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MyNightmareIsMyMirror/pseuds/MyNightmareIsMyMirror
Summary: Why are my hot neighbors standing outside my door (what the fuck, they're wearing suits?) when I could be eating a questionably healthy breakfast that includes specialty made pineapple jam and stale cereal?





	valentine under the sunshine

**Author's Note:**

> Warning: This story is copyrighted, I do not own the characters or anything pertaining the actual game (Dream Daddy), but the words and Crowmark Spritzer belong to me.

Crow didn’t expect any visitors on Valentine’s Day but, of course, his perfect plans of watching _ The Golden Girls _ and taking apart, cleaning, and putting his guns back together without even looking away from the screen were interrupted by a knock on the door. He knew for a fact that Amanda told her so-called “friends” that she would have been off to college by now, so it couldn’t be anyone she would know. It _ could _have been that telescope part he ordered, but Amazon said it wouldn’t arrive until next week. So that only leaves one alternative, unless another door-to-door salesman decided to shit on his Netflix and chill, and gun maintenance day, one of his stupidly attractive neighbors was on the other side of that door.

Crow didn’t really mind. In fact, since Amanda had left, he, the most antisocial fuck since Hitler, had immersed himself in his community and fellow cul-de-sac patrons. He and Mary had knocked a few Guiness’ back behind the counter of the pet shelter when the lobby was empty. He reluctantly helped Joseph at his church bake sale (there just wasn’t something right about that guy, besides the fact that his hair didn’t even move an inch when it was raining). Every Friday he was an honorary staff member at the Coffee Spoon alongside Carmensita, Pablo, and of course, Mat himself. Brian dragged him out of his dark house one day to make him help with the screen wall he was putting around his back porch, they watched House Flippers. After that, he became hooked, they binge watch it together on Tuesdays. Most of his nighttime goes to Robert since the man insists that they go cryptid hunting almost every night. Crow doesn’t mind, he’s always liked the dark. Hugo and Crow turned out to have similar reading interests, which surprised the both of them, they gather together on Wednesdays to read to themselves quietly together in Hugo’s living room and argue what they think the author is trying to convey over a plate of cheese. Crow also finds himself taking advantage of the key to Damien’s garden that Damien himself gifted to him on Easter. He makes sure to bring his own tea so Damien can try it, his personal favorite is Earl Grey. Craig and Crow jog every morning at 5:00, though he doesn’t really appreciate the brightness of dawn, Crow can enjoy the exercise regime that his college roommate made for them, really works the biceps.

Crow thought to himself, he had three choices: 

  1. Continue fixing his guns and pretend it never happened.
  2. Man up and answer the door.
  3. Fuck social dictation, it’s nacho time.

Crow narrowed his eyes at the door for a good thirty seconds.

“Open the door, Spritz!” Came Robert’s voice. “I know you’re there, I can feel the anxiety seeping through the door.”

Crow rolled his eyes, but didn’t answer, thinking to himself.

  1. Continue fixing his guns and pretend it never happened.
  2. ** Man up and answer the door.**
  3. Fuck social dictation, it’s nacho time.

Crow groaned, “‘Make friends,’ she said, ‘It’ll be fun,’ she said.” He grumbled through his recitation of his daughter’s words. He stopped at the door, banged his head against it once, and opened it. The sight before him made his eyes go unusually wide.

_ What. _

Damien smiled awkwardly, “Hello, Crowmark. As you can see, we seem to be having a disagreement, so we have called upon you to help us resolve it.” Crow doesn’t know how he gets his hair so coiffed that it could be seen in a crowd easily.

“I just told ‘em for there not to be any hard feelings for whoever you choose.” Brian said with an obnoxiously friendly air around him that made Hugo, who was standing next to him, glower slightly. Crow didn’t know whether that was a subtle, ‘_I know I’m going to win, but let’s all be good sports here._’ or ‘_make the competition look bad_’.

“I, uh, brought this.” Mat’s skin turned a pinkish color as he held out a cactus plant with a red bow wrapped around it. That would be useful in fending off mormons when they decide to bother him at ass o’clock in the morning.

“I tried out a little something that my grandmother showed me and I wanted to see what you think.” Joseph held out a mason jar filled to the brim with various cookies, brownies, and bits of chocolate and smiled so brightly that Crow had to blink several times to regain his eyesight.

_ Again, the fuck? _

“I told him that you didn’t like sweets, but he didn’t listen.” Robert groused. “That’s why I got this.” He said, holding up a- an actual bat. Huh. It’s really cute. Like, _ really _ cute. Crow doesn’t know whether he means the bat or the cherry red that’s spreading across the gruff man’s cheeks, but he tells himself that he'll worry about it later. Maybe when there _isn't _enough hotness standing at his door to melt the polar ice caps. Those poor penguins.

“If I remember correctly, _ Grimm’s Fairy Tales _is your preferred literature choice?” Hugo asked, holding the aforementioned novel.

_ Wha- _

“Hey, bro!” Craig’s voice boomed throughout the cul-de-sac. “I was gonna ask you this yesterday, but then I found out about this little competition and I just _ had _to give it a shot.”

Crow didn’t know what the fuck they were talking about, but the fact that they were in various crisp and clean suits with ties was enough to make him question his unusual choice of friends, not to mention make him feel rather uncomfortable in his two-sizes-too-small t-shirt, dark blue sweatpants, and five o’clock shadow.

Crow stared at his neighbors, completely at a loss for words and any basic human body functions. He was lucky that he managed to choke out the words that described his very feelings in that moment.

“What the _fuck? _” What else was there to say?

Crow took a moment to scan the mini crowd on his doorstep, then asked wearily, “What is this, James Bond? Why are you all in suits, in front of my door at seven o’clock in the morning?”

“Well, that’s the doozy, neighbor.” Joseph said, smiling timidly and rubbing the back of his neck with his free hand.

“Doozy? What doozy? There should be no doozy.” Crowmark was worried that whatever this _ doozy _was, would affect his quiet day in.

“Afraid there is, amigo.” Robert crossed his arms as the bat crawled up his arm to rest in the nape of his neck.

Mat had the decency to look sheepish, “Uh, yeah. See, we all had the same idea and, well, you know…” He gestured awkwardly to the other dads. “We’re here to see who you pick.”

“Pick?” _What in the hell were they talking about?_ _Why would he have to pick one of them?_

“It’s Valentine’s Day,” Hugo spoke up. “we are all interested in taking you out on a date as our Valentine, but we all know you can only pick one, so we decided to come here together to give everyone a fair shot. I apologize if we have overwhelmed you.” Hugo said with a worried look over his tanned features.

“Uh…” _ Great going, Spritzer, you’re supposed to be a damn detective, not a virgin at a prison riot! _ “Are you all saying what I think you’re saying, or am I reading this wrong?”

“If it is that we are interested in initiating courtship with you, then yes. You are correct.” Damien confirmed what was most people’s wet dream, but Crow’s worst nightmare. “I have brought an offering, a gift, if you will.” The Victorian-themed man held out a bouquet of white gardenias, red roses, and multi-colored alstroemerias, all tied together by a muted lavender ribbon.

Crow squinted at the cluster of flowers, taking the delicate specimens in his calloused hands. “Joy, a declaration of love, and friendship…” He muttered to himself as he recalled each flower’s meaning from the book he and his mother used so much the corners would curl and the pages would become worn as they discovered different flora together when he was a boy.

“That is correct!” Damien beamed. “I am simply besotted by your knowledge of flora.” He added on shyly.

“My turn, my turn!” Craig exclaimed, vibrating with barely concealed excitement.

“Of course,” Damien replied, politely stepping aside.

“Thanks, Dames!” Craig gave his neighbor a blinding grin then turned towards where Crow was standing stock still in his doorway.

“Crow, dude. You’ve been my best bro since college and I gotta say that if I had the chance to experiment more during my Keg Stand Craig days, you would’ve been the one I would have wanted to try it with.” Craig scratches the back of his neck, almost awkwardly. “But y’know, since we’ve started hanging again, I think my feelings towards you have changed from just Bro-tonic-” Robert snorted at that. “-so, I thought ‘Why not? The worst thing he could say is, _ nah bro, I don’t swing that way. _’ And I think I’m rambling again, so I’m just going to give you this.” Craig’s face slowly turned more into a doll pink as he spoke and was now blatantly obvious against his olive skin tone as he held out a black jogger’s bottle that Crow found to be filled with a green liquid after further inspection.

“Is this your fabled energy shake that doesn’t taste like ass?” Crow questioned, raising an eyebrow at the viscous substance inside the new item.

“You know it, bro!” Craig’s face melted back into its default excited puppy look, though his cheeks still had a light flush to them. “I wrote the recipe on the paper taped to the bottom, figured since we’ve been jogging buddies for almost six months now that I should let you in on the secret.” He winked.

“That’s a great gift, Craig.” Brian smiled good-naturedly at the fitness-fanatic, then asked. “Does anyone mind if I go next?” He didn’t hear any responses, so he stepped up in front of Crow and held out his offering.

_ Offering? What is this, Ancient Greece? _

“Here you are,” Brian said cheerfully, handing Crow a book that had _ Long Haul Paranormal Ice Road Ghost Truckers Manual: Limited Collector’s Edition _slapped across the front in an outrageous blocky font with Callum and Flynt Dogbone’s petrified faces illuminated by a bright flashlight as they ran away from what appeared to be the ghostly specter of a scraggly trucker. “I got in an online auction, it has the signatures of all of the main actors of the show.” He said, somehow sounding proud and humble at the same time.

“Wow,” Crow’s eyebrows raised high above his hairline. “This is the book that BBC issued for only two thousand copies to be made worldwide.”

“You betcha. Only costed me fifty George Washingtons,” Brian laughed heartily. “The other bidders were too busy arguing with each other to notice me.”

“Impressive.” Hugo commented. “May I go next?”

“Go ahead!” Brian smiled and stepped to the side to let Hugo pass.

“Hello, Crowmark.” Hugo greeted the stunned man as if they were meeting up for Trivia Night and not attempting, _ what did Damien call it? _ courtship. “I know that you are infatuated with the Brothers Grimm and fairy tales, even though you won’t admit it.” Crow ducked his head at that, embarrassed. “So I discovered that the local bookstore had a first edition copy of _ Grimm’s Fairy tales _and I thought you would appreciate it. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did when I was in sixth grade.” He handed Crow the book, their hands brushing slightly during the pass off.

Crowmark scanned the front, it was indeed a legit first edition. The majestic tree in the center, the branches twisting and curling all over the book with silhouettes of different story characters dancing along all four corners.

When Crow looked up from the book that was bringing back a ton of childhood memories to him, he saw Mat’s kind eyes and insanely shy demeanor looking back at him.

“Hey, man.” Mat’s voice still had its usual chill and laid back lilt to it, but his face gave his nervousness away. “To be completely honest, I’m surprised I managed to work up the courage to bring this to you.” He held out a charming little cactus that had a pair of little nerd glasses perched up on the arms of the green plant. “I remember you telling me that you and your sister raised a little cactus patch when you were ten, so I figured you would maybe like this?” The statement came out more as a question, but Crow didn’t mind.

Crow shifted the books Brian and Hugo gave him to his other arm to rest with Craig’s bottle, careful not to crush Damien’s flowers. He tentatively took the cute piece of nature and gazed at it. He couldn’t help but chuckle internally at its similarity to Mat with the little glasses on it.

“You remembered that?” Crow asked, amazed that Mat remembered some useless tidbit he shared about his life.

Mat nodded his head slowly, like it was the normal thing in the world. “Well, yeah, you listen to your friends when they speak. Of course, I would obviously like a shot at trying to be more than…” He trailed off awkwardly, then rubbed his neck. “...well, you know.”

Crow just nodded, he didn’t know how to respond to feelings. Especially _ these _kinds.

“What an absolutely lovely gift!” Joseph beamed. “Hello, Mark.” He waved and smiled so earnestly that Crow almost took a step back from its pure innocence and unadulterated radiation of happiness. 

“As I said before, these are some treats that my grandmother and I made while she was visiting just yesterday, I think you might’ve seen her? She was with me at the church bake sale.”

Oh, yes. The little old lady that practically screamed, ‘_ Warm hugs and soft, homemade sweaters with kittens and puppies playing together happily all over them.’ _ She spotted Crow among the crowd, which wasn’t that hard considering he emitted enough darkness and thunderclouds to play the literal city of Gotham ( _ no, like, the actual city itself) _ . She apparently thought he was a “ _ poor soul without a home _ ” and offered him some free brownies, which Crow felt too uncomfortable to take, let alone enjoy. Those kinds of social gatherings weren’t really for him. He was just dragged along with Mary as a booty call since Robert was busy at therapy (Crow was regretting forcing the man to go as he stared at this kind old woman that reminded him too much of his own Nana). The snarky woman said she needed someone _ just as unhappy and miserable as I am, _to which Crow reluctantly agreed that he fit the bill pretty well.

“We’ve…met.” Crow simply said.

“Ah, that’s good! Did she offer you a sweater in the middle of summer?” He asked with a knowing and sympathetic look.

“Brownies.”

Joseph chuckled, “Yes, that’s Grandma Elizabeth for you. Anyway,” He clapped his hands together as if to remind himself of the main topic. “These are for you.” He happily handed over the mason jar that was directed with little wonky hearts and pink dots. “The twins painted the hearts, Chris did the dots and the painted the lid. Oh! And if I remember,” He tilted the jar gently in my hand and showed the bottom, where a messy little handprint was stamped. “Crish wanted to leave his mark as well, I hope you don’t mind.” His smile turned a bit awkward at that.

Luckily, Crow had enough brain power to shake his head. “No, no, that’s fine. It’s cute.” Crow could only hope that what he said was considered polite in social interaction.

Thankfully, it seemed like the right choice since Joseph smile seemed even brighter than before. “I’m glad you think so, I’ll be sure to tell them that you liked it. Chris is crazy about you, you know.”

That somehow surprised him even more than the whole neighborhood virtually battling for his affection. That boy never had anything to smile about. “Really?”

“Yes,” Joseph nodded and leaned in conspiratorially . “I can certainly see why.” He winked.

Crow thinks he can be excused of the light heat that he can feel rising on his cheeks. That man could charm the pants off of a nun.

“Alright, let’s get this over with.” Robert cut in. He walked around Joseph, which wasn’t any small feat with how small and narrow the single step in front of his door was. The bat was laying on his shoulder, Robert’s poked it lightly to wake it. The furry little creature squeaked and hopped onto his open palm. 

“This is Daemon.” Robert spoke in his storytelling voice. _ Looks like he's jumping right in with the fable. _ “I met him when I was walking through the forest at the time of the witching hour. Around the time when I ventured right into the heart of the dense woods, I heard a snap behind me. _ Probably some spooked wildlife scurrying away, _I thought, so I kept walking. Four minutes later, I hear another snap. Now, I’m starting to feel a little suspicious, so I stand still and look around the opening that I’m in. I see nothing, so I cast the darkness around me one more narrowed look before continuing. When I hear a third snap, it’s confirmed that something is following me. An unusually persistent soul of the wild, perhaps? Or,” His voice lowers and he smirks slightly at Crow, it’s like he can tell that Damien and Mat are shaking while Brian looks on wide-eyed and nervous as he continues his story that Crow knows for a fact is a load of bullshit. “A demented wanderer, looking for their next victim?” Cue Hugo’s uneasy look.

“Of course, I was curious, so I just had to find out for myself. So, I just stand there, whatever it is’ll think that I’m easy prey and show themselves.” Robert leaned against my doorframe nonchalantly as he spoke on. “I was right. I hear the leaves behind me crunching, getting closer and closer…” His voice lowers a few octaves for more effect. “It’s dead quiet, I’m not moving, the crunching stops. whatever is there is now right behind me. I shift my foot and slowly turn around…” Joseph’s smile hasn’t wavered throughout the whole story. Alright, then.

“I expected to see a banshee or maybe even a grizzly, but I see nothing. Now, I’m confused. Did it vanish? Hide in the thick brush, maybe? Or,” He asks rhetorically with a devilish smirk as Mat let out a small whimper. “...is it still there?”

“I don’t trust it enough to move from my position, so I stay put. “ He continues, as if he didn’t just give most of his neighbors guaranteed nightmares. “It was about twelve seconds longer before I hear a small squeak. I wasn’t expecting it, so I jumped a bit. I’m not panicking, but I’m also not exactly calm. I’m looking all of 180 degrees around me, still nothing. I’m about to start walking back to my pickup, when I feel a light tap against my shoe, I look down and see a small little furball nestled among the red and oranges of the fallen leaves against the hard dirt ground. I have no idea what it is until two little slits open to reveal the biggest eyes on an animal that I ever saw. _ No offense, Betsy. _” He muttered to himself. “Next thing I know, the little guy is crawling up my leg. I can feel its little claws digging into my skin, it didn’t hurt, but it felt strange. Before I knew it, I was staring right into its furry face. And that's how Daemon came to be my shoulder warmer, now to be yours."

As if practiced, the bat flew from Robert’s hand and onto top of Hugo and Brian’s books, which Crowmark was still balancing on his left arm. It seemed seemed a bit put off at first, but settled down and folded its wings away and stared at detective with it's big eyes.

“He shouldn’t be too much trouble to care for,” Crowmark looked up at the sound of Robert’s voice, the gruff man was rubbing the back of his neck, Crow dare say it, shyly. “Just gotta throw him some rotten fruit and he’ll be good.”

“That’s…” Crow wasn’t sure what to say, Robert just got him an honest to God _ bat _ , the squeaking kind not the wood kind. “Thank you, Robert, I finally have someone to watch _ Rocky Horror _with when I’m feeling a craving for chili cheese dogs at two in the morning.” He huffed a laugh.

“Well hell, Spritz, you could’a just asked me.” Robert scoffed and crossed his arms in an obvious attempt to regain some masculinity in front of his neighbors.

“Wouldn’t want to interrupt your ever so important telenovela bingeing.” Crow threw back with a smirk, relieved to have some familiar and casual conversation. As he felt the weight of the gifts in his hands, he was suddenly struck with just how much he had gotten. “But seriously guys, this is too much. I don’t need gifts on Valentine’, you should give these to someone you really want to spend the day with.” He said, emphasizing _ too much _ by bodily hefting the pile of gifts up to keep them from slipping. Crow let out a surprised _ oof _when the cactus and Joseph’s jar of cookies start to slide off the books. The bat squeaked as it moved to set itself on Crow’s shoulder. 

“Lemme just…” He trailed off as he exited the doorway and consequently, his neighbors’ field of vision to set the plethora of gifts on the coffee table, after having shoved off a game controller and various photo albums to make room for them. He really needed to clean sometime…

Crow stalled for time before he had to face the situation at his door by arranging the things he moved into more neat places and making noises that sounded like him shuffling around his living room. He knew he couldn’t make them wait for long, the manners his Nana taught him wouldn’t let him. This needed to be addressed now, or their would several broken hearts and hurt feelings that he absolutely didn’t want. He had little Daemon sit down inside the little bird cage that he and Amanda apparently had for no apparent reason. _ Aesthetic, _she had said. He left the door unlocked and took a deep breath before practically zombie walking back to his door. 

“Alright,” He sighed and ran a hand through his hair. “As I was saying-”

“I’m gonna stop you right there.” Robert interrupted. “Listen real good, Spritz. Do you think I’m the kind of person to just give someone a gift that I don’t think is worth my time?”

Crowmark’s eyes squinted, “Well, no-”

“Exactly. And do you think I would make up some cockamamie story just for something I got at the pet shelter down the road if I wasn’t at least a bit interested in them?” Robert continued on, raising an eyebrow.

“No, you would probably ward them off with passive aggressive toxic masculinity and stories that make them question your moral compass.” Crow said in the unimpressed tone of someone who had witnessed it first hand at Jim and Kim’s when some twenty something wouldn’t take no for an answer.

“Precisely. So why are we talking about this know if you seem so familiar with it?”

“I don’t know, okay.” Crowmark sighed, frustrated. “I just don’t get why you guys are asking _ me _ of all people. You guys are incredible, eligible dads who clearly have no problem with finding a date. I’m… me. A lonely old hermit, a broken husk of the man I used to be. I’m with the police force, for God’s sake!” He cried. “I practically scream _ authoritarian, stickler, and by the books. _ You have to admit, I’m not exactly the ideal love interest.” 

“You’re right. You’re not the ideal love interest.” Brian spoke up. 

“I know-”

“You’re a better one.” He finished. “I will admit, I was, at first, wary to walk up to you. Everywhere you walked, you had a thundercloud over your head. But then I remembered that you shouldn’t judge a book by it’s cover, so I introduced myself. And it turned to be one of the smartest moves of my life. I got to know you, and you were amazing. I couldn’t believe I almost passed up the chance to have someone like you in my life.”

“I agree,” Damien added in. “You say you are a husk, but I see no husk here. Only a honest, wholesome man who has suffered one too many heartbreaks.”

“You’re the one that said I couldn’t love anyone until I stopped hating myself, Crow.” Robert said. “Don’t be a hypocrite and ignore your own advice.”

“It’s funny. ‘Cause what your saying doesn’t match up with what I’m seeing.” Mat said, crossing his arms.  
  


“Strange, the same thing is happening for me as well.” Hugo responded, adjusting his glasses as if to check again.

“Same here, bro! I can’t see anything I wouldn’t want for a boyfriend!” Craig’s bluntness resounded through the empty morning air.

“That’s seven against one, neighbor.” Joseph smiled. “I’m afraid you’ve been outvoted.”

Crow didn’t think he could be shocked after all the crap he had seen while on the job, but _ well, _ here he was, eyes wide and disbelieving. If he thought his face had been warm before, he didn’t even know the meaning of the word. However, that didn’t stop that tiny voice in his head that whispered about _ how much pity they must have, hmm? And for you, of all people. I suppose it makes sense, you can use all the wins you can get. _

Crowmark’s eyes drooped and he look off to the side to the ground, refusing to make eye contact. “You… you guys…” He sighed. “You guys have to the strangest people I’ve ever met.” He finally said, unsure of what else he _ could _say.

“With how you speak of all your former partners dumping you like nothing, I’d say that’s good.” Robert quipped.

“I… I’m just having trouble believing this.” Crow managed to get out through the shroud of the cloudy and dark thoughts swirling in his head. 

“Well, believe it. It’s what you get for being a patient, loving person who is just too damn perfect to even be real.” Robert said in his aggressively affectionate way that’s just so… Robert-y.

“I feel like this is one argument I won’t win, so I’ll let it go even if I don’t understand why.” Crowmark sighed defeatedly.

“Smart choice.” Joseph said amusedly.

“So, you’re all here to ask me on a date for Valentine’s, but from what I hear, it sounds like you all are more interested in something more long term. And let’s be honest, I couldn’t pick between all of you. So, this is either gonna end with a bunch of hurt feelings, or all the happiness I think one could possibly have. So what’s it gonna be?”

* * *

“I can’t believe this is happening.” Crowmark said, glaring off into the oceanic distance.

“Hey, you wanted seven boyfriends and you got them.” Mat replied, taking another sip from the coconut he was holding. He looked perfectly at peace with his lounge chair, sunglasses, and unbuttoned shirt.

“What a perfect way to spend Valentine’s day!” Joseph exclaimed, excitedly looking over every inch of the giant cruise ship they were on. 

“As long as there’s alcohol, it is.” Mary’s lazy form said from her spot under the giant beach umbrella, she had sunglasses and a giant beach hat on to go with her bathing suit and sarong. An unusual look for her, but not a bad one.

“Bet we could find some selkies out here, maybe sirens at night if we’re lucky.” Robert said, mostly to himself as he ran his knife down a chunk of wood he smuggled onto the boat.

“It’s too peaceful, the kids aren’t bothering us, I’m actually having a good time, and why is everything so perfect right now!” Hugo looked like he was about to start pulling his hair out. 

“Classroom withdrawal is hitting him hard.” Crowmark muttered, grumpily unbuttoning a few buttons of his shirt when the heat was getting to be too much. He had refused to take off his aviators since they were the only thing shielding his darkness-loving eyes from total pain and masculine manly tears that the damn fireball in the sky would no doubt rein upon him the minute he took them off.

"Here, love. Have a cheese board." Damien said soothingly to the frazzled teacher. "It will calm you down. Look, they even have the fig sauce that compliments the brie and gouda ever so splendidly." The pale man said, pushing it towards Hugo.

Hugo sighed and let Damien lead to the seat next to Mary, "Thanks, Damien." He dug into his cheese board as Damien went back to his book.

"Now, if only we could find a way to make Commissioner Gordon over there quit his brooding." Mary huffed, taking another big sip of her mimosa.

“Need to find his weak spot.” Robert said as if it was common knowledge. “Look at your husband, he’s like a kid in a candy store.” He said, pointing a thumb over his shoulder to the blonde man who was still marveling over the different knots and nautical themed decorations everywhere.

“Oh! I have an idea!” Craig spoke up and started digging through his bag. “When I was exploring, I found this little activities booth. Turns out there’s a mystery hunt that passengers can do to get a free piece of strawberry cake at the end of it. And there’s nothing my bro-friend loves more than a good mystery.” He pulled out the map that frankly looked like it belonged on Dora the Explorer.

“Did someone say ‘mystery’?” Crow popped out from nowhere, startling Mat. “Lemme see that.” He said grabbing the map Craig was offering to him. He looked over it for a second before scoffing. “Child’s play. The next clue is by the rock climbing wall.” And with that, he was marching off to begin his hunt for strawberry cake.

"I'll go with him." Robert declared, standing up and stretching. "I'll need him for my cryptid hunt later tonight, anyway." He stuffed the finished wooden dolphin into his pocket, folded his arms behind his head, and followed Crow down the stairs.

“Now it’s truly a good Valentine’s Day.” Mary sighed contently and leaned back with her mimosa in hand.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm not sorry. Please, if you liked this travesty of a story, leave comments or requests of what you would like to see Crowmark and the dads do next.


End file.
